(appendix a)

Yes, tis a day worthy of an appendix.  I am in Paris! 

Likely Paris would be worthy of an appendix any day, but today, I am overcome with gratefulness at being here.  I was STRESSED about my bus ride here today (refer to previous post for background on Moody Liz), my mind leading me down roads of getting lost/pickpocketed/mugged/worse and so on, and I was having a hard time shaking this general sense of unsettledness.  My decision to take the bus rather than the train was based entirely on the state of my bank account - I found a promotion bus fare for €22, whereas the regular train fare was anywhere between €64-88.  This seemed a no-brainer.  And so I arrived at the bus terminal in Brussels (already feeling unsettled), walked down a dirty staircase with a strong smell of urine, then passed a very large puddle of urine, and read signs that warned me of pickpocketers and told me that "I could not purchase my bus ticket with cash for my own safety". And then I gazed upon many of my fellow passengers. It became quite clear to me in that moment just how vast was the socio-economic divide between bus and train travel is in Belgium (this is not the case in all countries, as at times there are more expensive bus options and less expensive train options). Here I was, presented with one of very few moments in which I have felt incredibly vulnerable as a single woman travelling alone...

...So, you know, lots of self-talk, lots of reminding myself to take things moment-by-moment, and the brief version of the story is that all is fine.  In fact, all is more than fine.  As the crowd waiting to board the bus grew, I met two other solo-backpackers.  Instantly, I felt so much less like I was standing-out in this crowd; I had lovely companions to chat with during the journey, and also with whom to figure out the metro when we arrived in an East suburb of the city. We rocked the metro, and as I walked up the stairs from the metro station, on my own once again (this was one of the moments I had been nervous about: the walk from the metro to my hostel in an unknown area after dark - what if the streets were deserted? etc...), I emerged onto a bustling city square.  People everywhere, stores lit up, and a huge, beautiful statue illuminated before me. I burst out laughing. Paris.  Of course.  I'm fine.

Grateful for safety, grateful for this city whose vibrancy I can already sense, and grateful for my humble little hostel.  As I made my way up the 4 flights of stairs to my dorm room, I opened the door, to find two beds.  Two.  I am in a two-bed dorm.  I laid down, laughed again, and repeated "thank you, thank you, thank you" over and over.